Attention, Bachelor Nation. We have reached a Code 5 Bachelor emergency. Corinne Olympios and Chad Johnson are texting and hanging out. This is not a drill. The moment we’ve been waiting for since Corinne’s introduction has finally arrived, and we don’t even have to wait for God is good. This is a union for the ages. It is a tale as old as time. Song as old as rhyme. Beauty and the beast.
No, wait. That’s not right. What was I talking about? Oh yeah. Our two favorite villains to emerge from the Bachelor franchise, Corinne and Chad, hung out last night at anparty (unsure if it’s the sameparty that thecast
gets shitfaced at attends every year, but I guess we’ll find out next season). Anyway, Corinne, Chad, and Olivia (whose presence is irrelevant for the purposes of this story) all hung out at the party. Reports say Corinne started out at a table with four other girls and then migrated towards ChadI mean, who wouldn’t? That psycho charm is sooo alluring.
The two were spotted “having a lengthy conversation,” about what we’ll never know. Perhaps debating the merits of assorted deli meats versuscheese pasta? Or maybe having a philosophical discussion over what precisely it means to be “here for the right reasons”? We may have to wait untilto see how these conversations would play out in real life, but for now at least we have the pics.
But wait, there’s more. A few days ago, Chad toldthat he and Corinne arewait for ittexting! He said it was basically to commiserate with her over them both being the villains of their respective seasons, but I’m not convinced. You have two hot people texting, one of whom has a platinum vagine, and I’m expected to believe there have been no sexts or even shirtless selfies going on? Hah. Does it look like my birth certificate reads: “Boo Boo The Fool, Born 2lbs 3 oz. on February 22nd, 2017 at 9:01am”? There is something going on between these two; I’m sure of it. Even if that “something” is just “publicity.”
Whatever this is, I’m totally here for team #Charinne. You heard it here first.